Bill and Hillary are out driving in the country near Hillary’s hometown. They are low on fuel, so Bill pulls into a gas station for a fill-up. The attendant comes out and begins to pump gas into the first couple’s tank. As he is doing this, he looks into the passenger window. “Hey, Hillary. We …
Bill Clinton has a dream in which he meets George Washington. He says, “George, what can I do to make things better for the people?” George Washington says, “Lower the taxes.” Clinton replies, “Oh, George, I can’t do that.” The next night, Clinton dreams again but this time Thomas Jefferson is there. “Thomas,” Clinton says, …
You must follow the rules on this one exactly, otherwise it won’t work. It’s really scary how this works out. NO CHEATING!!!! First, get a pen and paper. Second, write the numbers one through six in a column. Next to number ONE, write any number. Next to number TWO, write the name of anyone to …
A man on his way home from work at the Pentagon was stuck in a traffic jam on Interstate 95, and he thought to himself, “Wow, this traffic seems worse than usual. Nothing’s moving.” The man noticed a police officer walking back and forth between the lines of cars, so he rolled down his window …
A lawyer finds out he has a brain tumor, and it`s inoperable – in fact, it`s so large, they have to do a brain transplant. His doctor gives him a choice of available brains – there`s a jar of rocket scientist brains for $10 an ounce, a jar of regular scientist brains for $15 an …
We’ve heard Clinton’s earlier remarks regarding lying to the American public. Here’s your right to know the following . . . (check date and source) “Public media should not contain explicit or implied descriptions of sex acts. Our society should be purged of the perverts who provide the media with pornographic material while pretending it …
Through the marvels of technology, we were able to use the new patented Bullcrap-Canceler 9000 to see what President Clinton was *really* trying to say in his August 17th Speech to the Nation. [Translated comments are in brackets.] “President Bill Clinton’s Speach” Aug. 17, 1998 CLINTON: Good evening. [Yo.] This afternoon in this room, from …
Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients for them to operate on: The first surgeon says: “Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.” The second responds: “Try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded.” The third surgeon says: “No, librarians are the best. …
An older couple had a son, who was still living with his parents. The parents were a little worried, as the son was still unable to decide about his career path… so they decided to do a small test. They took a ten-dollar bill, a Bible, and a bottle of whiskey, and put them on …
Letter to Thomas Jefferson The Court of King George III London, England July 10, 1776 Mr. Thomas Jefferson c/o The Continental Congress Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Dear Mr. Jefferson: We have read your “Declaration of Independence” with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration …
