Junk Mail 4

I haven’t received any junk mail from Kroger’s lately. I’m fairly certain that they haven’t sent me anything in 1999! In fact the only junk mail I get regularly are from companies that buy my name from APCC, the power protection people. APCC has not responded to my email requests that they not sell my …

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Choking

One day, two neighbors were having lunch at their favorite watering hole, when they heard this awful choking sound. They turned around to see a lady, a few bar stools down, turning blue from wolfing down a burger too fast. The first one said to the other, “Think we otta’ help?” “Yep,” said the other …

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Eve

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God… “Lord, I have a problem!” “What’s the problem, Eve?” “Lord, I know you’ve created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I’m just not happy.” “Why is that, Eve?” came the …

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Translating Management Speak

MANAGEMENT SPEAK: That’s very interesting. TRANSLATION: I disagree. MANAGEMENT SPEAK: I don’t disagree. TRANSLATION: I disagree. MANAGEMENT SPEAK: I don’t totally disagree with you. TRANSLATION: You may be right, but I don’t care. MANAGEMENT SPEAK: You have to show some flexibility. TRANSLATION: You have to do it whether you want to or not. MANAGEMENT SPEAK: …

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