Q: When does a person decide to become an engineer? A: When he realizes he doesn’t have the charisma to be an undertaker. Q: What do engineers use for birth control? A: Their personalities. Q: Why did the engineers cross the road? A: Because they looked in the file and that’s what they did last …
You may be a High Tech Redneck if…. (Apologies to Jeff Foxworthy) you have old computers up on blocks in the front yard. your e-mail address ends in “over.yonder.com.” you connect to the World Wide Web via a “Down Home Page.” the bumper sticker on your truck says “My other computer is a laptop.” your …
You’re a geek if … If you introduce your wife as “mylady@home.wife” If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie If you want an 8X CD-ROM for Christmas If Dilbert is your hero If you stare at an orange juice …
You might be an engineer if… (new material included) The only jokes you receive are through email At Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string of Christmas lights. Buying flowers for your girlfriend or spending the money to upgrade your RAM is a …
Continue reading ‘You Might Be An Engineer If… (new material included)’ »
You might be addicted to the Net if… You actually wore a blue ribbon to protest the Communications Decency Act. You kiss your significant other’s home page. Your bookmarks list takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom. Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them. You find yourself brainstorming for new …
You are an Internet Addict when… You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading. You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don’t have a clue as to when it happened. Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to go from top to bottom. Your nightmares are in HTML …
You might be a Federation Redneck if… ….he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of “Bassmaster.” ….he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens. ….he paints the starship John Deere green. ….he refers to a Pulsar as a “Blue Light Special. ….he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a “swamp.” ….his moonshine …
Something to be shared by educators and/or their spouses. You might be a teacher if… You want to slap the next person who says, “Must be nice to have all your holidays and summers free. You can tell it’s a full moon without ever looking outside. You believe “shallow gene pool” should have its own …
You might be an engineer if If you stare at an orange juice container because it says CONCENTRATE. If your wrist watch has more computing power than a 486DX-50. If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie. If you can name 6 Star Trek episodes. If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead …
Have you ever wondered if you might be an engineer?? If you refer to your spouse as “woman@home.wife” you may be an engineer. (But only if you’re a MALE engineer) If your favorite TV show is “Mr. Wizard” instead of “Baywatch,” you may be an engineer. If when your family is expecting, you are more …
Continue reading ‘Have you ever wondered if you might be an engineer??’ »
