Swimming

There was a competition to swim from Santa Monica to Catalina doing only the breaststroke, and the three women who entered the race were a brunette, a redhead and a blonde. After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the shore and was declared the fastest breaststroker. About 40 minutes later, the Redhead crawled …

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Beeper

A man and his little nephew were in line at the movies. The little boy was standing in front of his uncle and in front of the little boy was a very large woman with a very wide behind stretched from one side to the other. Well the little boy looked at the woman’s behind …

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What Do Babies Think?

Look Who’s Thinking – What Do Babies think? [From “The Dad Zone: Reports from the Tender, Bewildering, and Hilarious World of Fatherhood”, by Michael Burkett (Simon & Schuster, 1993)] Due to an incredible scientific breakthrough accomplished with the newest and most sophisticated brain-wave analysis devices, it is now possible to literally read the minds of …

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Cow-ism

Socialism — If you have 2 cows, you give one to your neighbor. Communism — If you have 2 cows, you give them to the government; and the government gives you some milk. Fascism — If you have 2 cows, you keep the cows but give the milk to the government, who then sells you …

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