Technology for Country Folk

Log On:
Making a wood stove hotter.
Log Off:
Don’t add no more wood.
Monitor:
Keeping an eye on the wood stove.
Download:
Gettin’ the farwood off the truk.
Mega Hertz:
When yer not keerful gettin’ the farwood.
Floppy Disc:
Whutcha git from tryin’ ta carry too much farwood.
Ram:
That thar thing whut splits the farwood.
Hard Drive:
Gettin’ home in the winter time.
Prompt:
Whut the mail ain’t in the winter time.
Windows:
Whut to shut when it’s cold outside.
Sscreen:
Whut to shut when it’s blak fly season.
Byte:
Whut dem dang flys do.
Chip:
Munchies fer the TV.
Micro Chip:
Whut’s in the munchie bag.
Modem:
Whacha did to the hay fields.
Dot Matrix:
Old Dan Matrix’s wife.
Lap top:
Whar the kitty sleeps.
Keyboard:
Whar ya hang the keys.
Software:
Them dang plastic forks and knifes.
Mouse:
Whut eats the grain in the barn.
Main Frame:
Holds up the barn ruf.
Port:
Fancy Flatlander wine.
Enter:
Northerner talk fer “C’mon in y’all”.
Random Access Memory:
When ya can’t ‘member whut ya paid fer the rifle when yer wife asks.
Mouse pad:
That hippie talk fer the rat hole.