VIRUS: True and Unstoppable Evil...
VIRUS: True and Unstoppable Evil...
Date: Mon, 21 Apr 1997 13:07:22 -0400
Be afraid, be very afraid....
If you receive an e-mail with a subject of "Badtimes," delete it
immediately WITHOUT reading it. This is the most dangerous Email virus
yet.
It will re-write your hard drive. Not only that, but it will scramble
any disks that are even close to your computer. It will recalibrate
your refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice cream gets melted.
It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit cards, screw up
the tracking
on your VCR and use subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you try
to play.
It will give your ex-boy/girlfriend your new phone number. It will
mix antifreeze into your fishtank. It will drink all your beer and
leave its socks out on the coffee table when there's company coming over.
It will put a dead kitten in the back pocket of your good suit and hide
your car keys when you are late for work.
Badtimes will make you fall in love with a penguin. It will give
you nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your petrol
tank and shave off both your eyebrows while dating your current
boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing the dinner and hotel room
to your Visa card.
It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead, such
is the power of Badtimes, it reaches out beyond the grave to sully
those things we hold most dear. It moves your car randomly around
parking lots so you can't find it. It will kick your dog. It will
leave libidinous messages on your boss's voice mail in your voice!
It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It
is also a rather interesting shade of mauve. Badtimes will give you
Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat up. It will make a
batch of Methamphetamine in your bathtub and then leave bacon cooking on
the stove while it goes out to chase High School kids with your
new snowblower.
These are just a few of the signs... Be very careful!
| 
