Federation Redneck Quiz

You might be a Federation Redneck if…

….he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of “Bassmaster.”

….he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens.

….he paints the starship John Deere green.

….he refers to a Pulsar as a “Blue Light Special.

….he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a “swamp.”

….his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale.

….his idea of a dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls.

….he wears mirrored shades on the bridge.

….his idea of a “gas giant,” is that big ol’ Number One “Bubba” after a meal of beans and weenies.

….he sets his phaser to “Cajun.”

….he yells “Yee-Ha!” instead of “Engage.”

….he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser.

….he insists on calling his Number One “Bubba” of “Hoss.”

….he refers to Photon Torpedoes as “Popguns.”

….he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil.

….he has the shuttlecraft up on blocks for over a month.

….he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles.

….he names one of the shutttlecraft “Billy Joe Bob.”

….he refers to Klingons as “Critters.”

….he installs a set of bull horns on the front of the saucer section.

….he says “got your ears on, good buddy,” instead of “open hailing frequency.”

….he hangs fuzzy dice over the view screen.

….he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle.

….he keeps a six-pack under his command chair, and a gun rack above it.