A Frenchman, an Englishman, and a New Yorker were captured by cannibals. The chief comes to them and says, “the bad news is that now that we’ve caught you, we`re going to kill you. We will put you in a pot and cook you, eat you, and then use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you get to choose how you die.”

The Frenchman says, “I take ze sword.” the chief gives him a sword, he says, “Vive la France!” and runs himself through.

The Englishman says, “a pistol for me, please.” the chief gives him a pistol, he points it at his head, says, “God save the queen!” and blows his brains out.

The New Yorker says, “gimme a fork.” the chief is puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The new Yorker takes the fork and starts jabbing himself all over– the stomach, the sides, the chest, everywhere. There’s blood gushing out all over, it`s horrible.

The chief is appalled, and asks, “my God almighty, what are you doing?”

The New Yorker says, “so much for your canoe, dummy!”