Six Presidents

6 Presidents on a sinking boat Ford says: “What do we do” Bush says: “Man the lifeboats” Reagan says: “What lifeboats” Carter says: “Women first” Nixon says: “Screw the women” Clinton says: “You think we have time?” Date: Mon, 13 Sep 1999 11:56:34 -0500

Al Gore

True story………. Have any of you heard how Al Gore lives a Christ centered life? He gave a big speech this week about how his faith is “so important” to him. Well, the funny part is, he said his favorite Bible verse is “John 16:3”. Of course, the speech writer meant “John3:16” but Al & …

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Socialism — If you have 2 cows, you give one to your neighbor. Communism — If you have 2 cows, you give them to the government; and the government gives you some milk. Fascism — If you have 2 cows, you keep the cows but give the milk to the government, who then sells you …

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President Clinton is arriving back in D.C. after a trip to his home state of Arkansas. He steps out of the plane carrying two pigs, one under each arm. When he reaches the bottom of the stairs the Marine sharply salutes him as usual. Clinton says: “I’d salute you back son, but as you can …

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Lemon Juice

The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the …

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