Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 18:21:10 -0500
A man reads in the paper of a white gorilla in a zoo far away. He
decides that he just has to see it. The journey will be a long and
arduous one but he simply cannot resist. He sets out on his trip and
travels by car to the docks, and catches a boat across a huge ocean.
After weeks of sea travel he arrives at the other side and takes a train
to the zoo.
When he sees the white gorilla he can't believe his eyes, it's the
most beautiful thing he's ever seen. He simply must get a closer look, so
he goes to the zoo manager and begs to be allowed into the gorilla's cage.
After much arguing the man finally persuades the manager to let him in
to the gorilla's cage, but before he does he tells the man that whatever
he does he must not under any circumstances touch the white gorilla. The
man agrees and is led to the cage.
He tip-toes into the cage and is amazed, the gorilla is even more
beautiful close up than it was from a distance. The white gorilla just
sits quietly and looks at the man. After a while the man gets use to
being so close to the gorilla and it seems so peaceful and calm that
he starts to think that there can't be any harm in touching the gorilla.
He slowly moves closer and closer to it, all the time the white gorilla
just looks calmly at him. He reaches out his arm and gently touches
Just as his arm makes contact the gorilla jumps up and starts roaring.
The man turns and runs to the exit, getting there just before the
gorilla. He leaps through the door and the keepers slam the door just
The gorilla, pulls at the door and to the man's horror the bars start
to bend. The man runs out of the zoo and to the train station and jumps
on the train, which as luck would have it is just leaving. He glances
back and can see the gorilla chasing after the train, but not gaining on
it. The train arrives at the docks and the man quickly scampers aboard
The boat leaves and the man thinks he's safe at last. He relaxes and
starts to enjoy the leisurely cruise back across the ocean. The day
they're due back in port he's walking on deck when he sees a small shape
in the water trailing behind the boat. He can't make it out so he borrows
a pair of binoculars from someone. He focuses the binoculars on the
small shape and is horrified to discover that it's the white
gorilla, swimming behind the boat. It must have been there all along.
The boat then arrives in port and the man hurries through customs and
rushes to his car. He drives off just in time to see the gorilla
climbing out of the ocean from his rear view mirror. He drives as fast as
he can to his house and runs in locking the door behind him. All the
time being followed be the huge white gorilla. The gorilla starts
pounding on the door and having seen what it did to the cage at the zoo
the man knows it won't take it very long to get in. He runs from room
to room trying to think of a place he can hide. He hears the door
shatter and dives into a wardrobe and pulls the door closed behind
him. Outside the gorilla is going mad trying to find the man, he's
ripping things up and tearing out doors. Finally he comes to the
wardrobe the man is hiding in and rips the door off. The gorilla sees
the man and smiles, reaches out a massive hand and gently touches the
man and says...
"Tag, you're it".