Never

Never

Date: Tue, 8 Apr 1997 10:22:04 -0400

Never say anything on the phone that you wouldn't want your mother to hear at your trial. -Sydney Biddle Barrows, the "Mayflower Madam"

Never say "Oops" in the operating room. - Dr. Leo Troy

Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words "large" or "size" with "rear end". Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me. -Tim Allen

Never wear a backward baseball cap to an interview unless applying for the job of umpire. -Dan Zevin

Never play peekaboo with a child on a long plane trip. There's no end to the game. Finally I grabbed him by the bib and said, "Look, it's always gonna be me!" -Rita Rudner

Never murder a man when he's busy committing suicide. -Woodrow Wilson

Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room. -Winston Churchill

Never pick a fight with anyone who buys ink by the barrel. -American adage about antagonizing newspaper editors. You got a problem with that?