Jesus vs. Elvis
Jesus vs. Elvis
Date: Mon, 19 May 1997 12:36:41 -0400
1) Jesus said, "Love thy neighbor." (Matthew 22:39)
Elvis said, "Don't be cruel." (RCA, 1956)
2) Jesus is the Lord's shepherd.
Elvis dated Cybill Shepherd.
3) Jesus is part of the Trinity.
Elvis' first band was a trio.
4) Jesus walked on water. (Matthew 14:25)
Elvis surfed. (Blue Hawaii, Paramount, 1965)
5) Jesus' entourage, the Apostles, had 12 members.
Elvis' entourage, the Memphis Mafia, had 12 members.
6) Jesus was resurrected.
Elvis had the famous 1968 "comeback" TV special.
7) Jesus said, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink."
(John 7:37)
Elvis said, "Drinks on me!" (Jailhouse Rock, MGM, 1957)
8) Jesus fasted for 40 days and nights.
Elvis had irregular eating habits (e.g., 5 banana splits for
breakfast).
9) Jesus is a Capricorn. (December 25)
Elvis is a Capricorn. (January 8)
10) Matthew was one of Jesus' many biographers. (Gospel According to
Matthew)
Neil Matthews was one of Elvis' many biographers.(Elvis:A Golden
Tribute)
11) "[Jesus'] countenance was like lighting, and his raiment white as
snow." (Matthew 28:3)
Elvis wore snow-white jumpsuits with lightning bolts.
12) Jesus lived in a state of grace in a Near Eastern land.
Elvis lived in Graceland in a nearly eastern state.
13) Mary, an important woman in Jesus' life, had an Immaculate
Conception.
Priscilla, an important woman in Elvis' life, went to
Immaculate Conception High School.
14) Jesus was, first and foremost, the son of God.
Elvis' first records, which today are still considered his
foremost recordings, were with Sun Studios.
15) Jesus was the Lamb of God.
Elvis had muttonchop sideburns.
16) Jesus' Father is everywhere.
Elvis' father was a drifter, and moved around quite a bit.
17) Jesus was a carpenter.
Elvis' favorite high school class was wood shop.
18) Jesus wore a crown of thorns.
Elvis wore Royal Crown hair styler.
19) Jesus said, "Man shall not live by bread alone."
Elvis liked his sandwiches with peanut butter and bananas.
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